Whether dating that someone special or having been married for 50 years, most people think the mood for romance is something that only has to do with that moment. Lovers also seem to forget that each persons stress levels, work loads & day to day nonsense can have a profound effect on their desire to engage in any sexual activities. Lovers often take the old “I’m not in the mood” as a personal insult. Most of the time this is not the case. Knowing what’s going on in your partners life & how they react to life’s trials & tribulations will often help you with setting the mood at the right time & place.

Setting the Mood Starts in Everyday Life!

Some people just don’t get the fact that if your day to day life with your lover is out of sync, your love life will suffer. Not to attack the men, being one myself, but this definitely applies to men more than women. Guys just don’t understand why their lovers aren’t in the mood after a day of work, kids etc, etc. One of the most common complaints by women is about this very subject.

Most men seem to feel that coming home from work, eating & sitting on the couch is all that is required of them in a relationship. The first thing most men need to realize is that a woman’s attitude towards them & sex with them, starts with how they work in this day to day relationship. Just like men, even though they won’t admit it, women want to feel they are not being taken for granted & need support & nurturing from their lover. Things as simple as helping out with some housework or the kids or even as simple as taking out the garbage without being asked are a giant leap in the right direction.

Giving your lover some time to do the things they want to do, instead of what they have to do, makes them feel like their life is just a little better. In the long run it makes everyone’s life just a little easier & relieves some of the pressures that effect a great sex life.

Women must also understand that men react in very negative ways to stress, & that sex can be one of the first things effected by this stress. Learn to recognize these aspects of your lover’s life & try to help them cope with these events. A nurturing & supportive lover is a turn on to anyone!

Appearance didn’t stop with dating!

Why is it that when people become comfortable in a relationship they stop worrying about their appearance? The image of Al Bundy comes to mind, flopped on the couch, beer in hand with his other hand down his pants. I don’t know why that popped into my head but I think it sums up where I’m coming from.

If lovers would put 1/10 the amount of effort into their personal appearance after they got comfortable in their relationship as they did while dating the birth rate would skyrocket! Of course this doesn’t apply to everyone, but I would like you to stop & think about it for a moment. Think about how you primped & prompted for a date when you were single (yes guys, this applies to you too). Most people would never have left the house, let alone gone out on a date without every facet of their looks being just right. OK, now that we’ve got that image in your head, I want you to think about how you appear to your lover now. HMM, Scary isn’t it? Now I know we all say that once we are in love that shouldn’t matter, but honestly, do we believe that?

Ladies, have we stopped wearing makeup except for special occasions? Has the “at home” attire become a flowered muumuu or sweats? Men, are you sitting around in sweats or your work clothes all night? Has shaving become an optional event? Granted none of these things are grounds for divorce court, but they sure aren’t helping rev things up in the bedroom. All I’m trying to say here is that a little effort to remind your lover why they chased you around in the dating game could do wonders!

Let’s Venture On

As you venture through the pages of this site & move onward & upward into a great new sex life, remember that how you appear to your lover, both in a physical & mental aspect has a lot to do with setting the mood for great sex. We must all also remember that love & relationships is a 100% thing. Give a 100% (or more) in any & all ways & you will never regret it.

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