The thought of anal sex makes many people cringe, thinking mostly about pain, or of gay males. All these negatives are closed-minded ways to think of one way to express erotic feelings for your lover. Though anal sex isn't necessarily the best way to approach sex with a new partner, or for the first time with a partner & shouldn't be attempted without some pre-planning, it can be an exciting way to explore new sensations. Whether it's her first anal sex or his there are quite a few things to consider and not something to be tried without your partner's knowledge and permission.

Anal Sex for Men

Anal sex isn't just a gay thing nor is it only a way for heterosexual males to perform on their female partners. It is said that a male G Spot can be reached from stimulation inside the anus. This so-called G Spot is also know as the prostate gland. It can be reached by inserting a finger into a male partner during foreplay or intimate exploration. Don't stop reading, men. If you haven't tried it, you can't say that it won't feel great for you! The prostate can be massaged with a finger easily while their partner performs oral sex, creating orgasms that have been described as nothing short of earth shattering. lubricant is a must as it makes finger insertion easier. Once inside the male partner, by making a "come here" type motion (gently) the finger can massage the male G Spot. One caution for the ladies here, make sure your fingernails aren't too long or sharp. An internal cut can cause many, many problems!

If a finger is out of the question for anal sex we would suggest a small vibrator or dildo. If the man has never done this before you will more than likely need to start with something slim. Once they have become used to it you may be able to increase the size of the toy but never try a large toy on someone who has never experienced anal sex. It can be quite painful if the toy is too large or is inserted too far. Use of graduated anal beads (see below) may also help him to become accustomed to each larger bead size as slowly as needed. Today manufacturers of anal sex toys make a size for everyone, so do your homework before buying one!

Straight men who enjoy anal sex may also want to look into the vast array of strap ons available today. Many of these allow different sized toys to be attached, ensuring the man's comfort. One new device called the Feeldoe has a "bulb" the female can insert into her vagina, removing the burdensome straps from the mix. This toy also has ribs that rub against the woman's clitoris and a built in vibrator making the experience great for both partners. Many women we have talked to also find this toy hits their G Spot while thrusting forward!

Anal Sex for Women

Anal sex can also be gratifying for women. The anus is an area with densely packed nerves making it very sensitive. This can be a root of intense pain if not approached with care but can also be a way to unleash extra intense and even orgasmic sensations. Anal sex can also be a turn on from the boring old positions. Some women enjoy rear entry sex just as their partners enjoy the power afforded to them from this position. As with men her first anal sex should be approached slowly with a lot of lubrication. Again, with any anal sex a finger or small toy should be used to start off until you are sure she is comfortable with it. We do not recommend starting with your penis! It may be way too much for the first time and could very well turn her off from anal sex forever! Patience and taking it slow will allow her to decide if this is only her first anal sex or her last.

Once a woman has started to enjoy anal sex she may want to try what is known as "double penetration". Double penetration is when a woman has both normal intercourse while also having anal sex. This can be accomplished in several ways. First off there are quite a few double headed sex toys made specifically for this purpose. Toys such as the Double Penetration Vibrator has a normal sized penis for vaginal insertion along with a smaller, slimmer penis for anal penetration. These toys come with our without vibrators and have been tested to assure a "proper fit".

If you're ready to try an entrance through the so-called "back door", be sure to discuss it with your partner. They might be excited by the new frontier, but they could also have stereotypes about anal sex that make them uncomfortable with the topic. This makes it something that you should wait for and should probably be reserved for intimate couples who are emotionally ready to explore the non-traditional (and unleash wild pleasure)!

Probably the most important tip to remember when engaging in anal intercourse is the use of a good lubricant. Foreplay is still necessary to achieve mental readiness for sex and to heighten pleasure. However, the anus doesn't respond the way a vagina does by producing lots of wetness that makes sliding in and out easy. Instead, thickly apply lube to the toy (or penis) and to the anus. If things seem to be "drying out" make sure to take the time to apply some extra lube. There are also several lubes that contain a mild desensitizing cream, such as Anal-Eze . These lubes are specially made to stop minor pain while adding the required amount of lubricant.

One other important part of any anal sex is for the person receiving it to relax. Even though the first instinct for most people is to clench, penetration is nearly impossible this way. To enjoy truly enjoy anal sex you must learn to relax something you have been trained all your life not to relax. Inserting the toy, or penis, very shallowly then withdrawing can help gradually increase deepness and make the experience easier. The use of graduated toy, like the X-10 Anal Beads can make the first experience easier too. These anal beads start very small and gradually get larger the more the insertion. Once muscles are ready to accommodate the penis, slow, deliberate thrusts can stimulate both partners to a new level of pleasure.

The male can also observe his penis entering his partner from this position & it can be a big turn on, but don't get to excited too fast & force the issue. Too much too soon will almost always ruin the moment & the effort put in to that point. He can also stroke the breasts and clitoris of his female partner as he thrusts.

Though anal sex isn't a traditional way to be sensual, it can be new and exciting. Providing that both partners are comfortable with the idea and enough foreplay and lubricant are used in the experience, this rear entry could become a friendly frontier for lovemaking.

As a final note, always remember to make sure any toys used for anal sex (or anything for that fact) should be cleaned thoroughly before any insertion into the vagina. Not taking these precautions can produce nasty infections! Some people also prefer covering any toy used for anal sex with a condom.

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