Not Interested

Julie · 05-14-2008, 03:13 AM

My fiance and I have lived together for almost 3 years. For the last year, he's barely touched me at all. I have tried everything, but he's just not interested. I have even tried spending the whole day running around the apartment nude. Its been a frustrating year. Any advice for me?

purple · 05-14-2008, 03:27 AM

Have you tried asking him? Guys tend to be pretty hard to figure out and it could be anything from stress at work to an arguement over cards with his friend last year he never finished dealing with. Sit him down and have an honest talk about how you feel and what might be bothering him.

Julie · 05-14-2008, 01:45 PM

I can't ask him. I love him so much, and aside from the sex issue, we have a perfect relationship. But sometimes I just long to be touched. Its probably been a year since he even kissed me. And more than that since we've done anything besides sleep in our bedroom. Still, asking him just seems like begging. I've only asked for something once, a long time ago, and what I asked seemed to spoil the mood that time. Thinking about it, maybe that's what started this whole thing.

Carrie · 05-15-2008, 04:23 AM

Honey, if you can't ask him, you don't have a perfect relationship. You HAVE to be able to talk about sex. If you are not having your needs met, that will be a huge issue down the line. Talk with him about it at a time that you are not being intimate. It is important for you to be on the same page.

Justwantfun · 05-15-2008, 09:49 PM

Talking to him is the only way for him to know something is wrong. Communication is the key to any successful relationship. I agree that you may not have a perfect relationship if you have any "besides the..." or "except for". If you running around nude isn't the answer (is that contagious? I need to have my wife catch that...but I digress) then something is going on. If it has been a year since you've been kissed you need to talk to him and find out. Being open and honest about everything, especially sex, is important.

jwf

Julie · 05-17-2008, 01:48 PM

Its just that with my ex, the sex was the only good thing about the relationship. This time around I thought I found the relationship that I always wanted, now I'm missing what I used to have. If my fiance had my ex's sex drive, life would be perfect. I think the whole problem started here over the issue of reciprocation.