Masturbation, the word makes people giggle, but most of all it usually makes them uncomfortable. Just refer to masturbation in a group of friends and watch them squirm. That’s odd, because it is the one thing that 99.9% of all creatures, human and animal alike, have in common. As children, we naturally explore our bodies, finding each part quite fascinating. That is, until we are caught, and scolded. Then, conditioned like Pavlov’s dogs, we learn not to discuss the taboo subject and to feel guilt because we have this secret pleasure.

One of our purposes on this site is to erase these silly taboos and more importantly, we want to convey that masturbation is extremely NORMAL! Some women have never explored their bodies or their sexuality. They are too uncomfortable with their sexuality, or forbidden by their up-bringing. These women are unable to communicate with their lovers what they like, prefer and need to achieve orgasm or to have successful sexual relationships. If they do not know how and why and what their bodies can do, they can’t share. Women who masturbate are more likely to have more fulfilling sexual experiences (and orgasms) so let’s start the conversation!

For Those Who Never Have

Masturbation is the art of learning your body and exploring your own sexuality. It can also be used to relax you and to teach you how wonderful your body really is. Let’s start with a nice warm bath, bubbles if you like them. After you’re feeling relaxed and mellow take the soap and run it slowly over your body. Caress your arms and legs, feeling the softness of the soap, enjoying the privacy and intimacy of the moment. Caress your breasts, making swirling motions around your nipples…feel the sensation. Take the soap and gently caress your pubic area. Swirl the soap in circular motions, adding just a little pressure, you will feel a gentle warmth growing in that area. Now, put the soap back in the dish, and finish your bath. Dry off and apply a body oil, take your time & feel each inch of your skin. Feel how it reacts to being touched. Head towards the bedroom…Lay down on clean sheets, in a candlelit room (if you don’t pamper yourself, who will?) Prop yourself up a little with your pillows and begin to explore your body. You may already have a good idea of what areas feel the most sensation from your bath. Return to those areas and experiment with different degrees of pressure and intensity, letting the sensations be your guide.

The Clitoris

The thought occurs to me that if you’ve never done this, you may not even know where it’s located (I couldn’t even find it the first time I “looked”). While it may seem logical for the clitoris to be located in or even near the vagina, that would be too simple. It’s located above it, at the top of the pubic region (making it easier to reach, but more difficult to be stimulated during intercourse, but that’s another subject). Apply pressure to this area until you locate the right spot & believe me, you’ll know it when you find it! Experiment to discover what feels best, rub gently up & down over the clitoral area, then try a circular motion. Try pushing down on the area with your hand, do you feel more pleasure with friction (rubbing) or pressure? On the left or right side of the clitoris or directly on the head (on top)? Fast motions or slow?

Sometimes, it helps to slip one of your fingers into your vagina, taking some of your own wetness and using it to lubricate your clitoris. You might want to leave a finger inside the vagina, using the other hand to manipulate the clitoris. Whatever works! It may take some time to discover exactly what you like the most so don’t don’t rush or pressure yourself to find the perfect spot the first time. Hopefully, you know what an orgasm feels like (if not see the section: Orgasm / Her). When you start to feel it beginning, you’ll know you found the right place and the right method.

For Those Who Do

Hello, ladies! This section will be for finding new and exciting ways to pleasure yourself (sometimes you just don’t have a partner, a date or you just want to be alone…any reason is a good one to get in touch with yourself!). From manual manipulation to dildos & vibrators to shower massagers we’ll talk about it all! Each month we’ll present you with different ideas and ask you to send us your suggestions & experiences to share with other women. If you check out the Using Sex Toys section there are some great reviews on several toys to get you started & check back often for lots more! We look forward to hearing from you!

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